I don’t have a pet or a question. My mom says I’m irresponsible. We’ll see.
I just wanted you to know that I drew a picture of you wearing Uncle Mort’s Hat. I also put a dollar from my mom’s purse in the envelope.
Thanks for helping me understand what it’s like to have a pet!
Thanks! You’re really good at drawing me. I’m sharing your picture with all my readers:
P.S I spent the dollar on bacon. Send more (dollars or bacon, doesn’t matter).
I would like to go see the Northern Lights, do you know a good spot to see them?
Here’s the top five places to view the Northern Lights:
Better start walking now!
My disapproving grandmother
thankfully recently passed and left me her pet parakeet, Johnson Delux. At first he was just annoying and slightly racist, but now it yells at me in her voice whenever I eat something she disapproves of, skip church, wear black, hang out with Judy (she has a toe piercing), think about dancing, vote, bang smack, or stay up past 9 p.m.
It goes without saying that this is putting quite a damper on everything. Can you please do your thing and help me out?
I traveled into the spirit world and tried to have a talk with Johnson and it did not go well. I suggest you get a cat, leave the bird’s cage door unhinged, and go for a walk.
Nature will take its course and by the time you get back home, everything will be back to normal.
That’s all the letters we have today. I’d like to let you that I recently appeared on Wizard on Whizzin’, Sound Only Edition- It’s a Podcast. While I can’t say I’m totally happy with the interview, I can’t say I’m totally displeased either. However, I’m sure you’ll enjoy it. You can find it here. I’ll see you next month!
Merwin Smith has been a professional psychic pet his entire life. Even though he realized his gifts at an early age, he didn’t start pet psychic-ing professionally until 20 years ago.
He quickly became the darling of the pet psychic scene and was one of the most requested readers at “The Psychic Pet Pet Psychic Shack”.
If you have a question about your pet, you can email Merwin at: firstname.lastname@example.org